Needs A Push

[trikzter2000]

A man and his wife are awakened at three o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is three o'clock in the morning!"

He slams the door and returns to bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife.

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.

"Did you help him?" she asks.

"No, I did not, it is three in the morning and it is pouring outside!"

"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife.

"Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us?" "I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain.

He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"

"Yes," comes back the answer.

"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.

"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.

"Where are you?" asks the husband.

"Over here on the swing!" replies the drunk.

[bri]

Only just came across this one. Brilliant!!! I told it my wife and she thought it was great.

[Stephanie]

It was a dark and stormy night (no, really) and the hitchhiker had been walking for miles in the driving rain. The question of why the rain should be driving and not he crossed his mind briefly, but he plodded on.

Suddenly from behind him he saw headlights approaching. Eerily silent, a car pulled up and stopped beside him. Too wet and tired to think, he opened the passenger door and climbed in. It was only as the car pulled away that he noticed - THERE WAS NO DRIVER IN THE CAR!

Petrified with fear, all he could do was watch transfixed as the car wandered erratically down the shoulder before heading out onto the pavement. As it neared the centreline, suddenly a disembodied hand reached in and turned the wheel, directing the car to safety. The ghostly hand disappeared as mysteriously as it had appeared.

Now picking up speed on the downhill, the frighteningly silent car began careening towards the shoulder and the terrified hitchhiker, too terrified to move, began to think this was to be his last night on earth. But again, the ghostly hand appeared and directed the car to safety.

This went on for a while, until the car finally stopped quietly (of course) at the outskirts of a small village. The hitchhiker quickly gathered his backpack and his wits and leaped from the car. He walked down the sidewalk and into a small pub. Thoroughly shaken, bedraggled and dripping, he sat down at the bar and ordered a drink.

Behind him, the door opened and two more equally bedraggled travellers staggered in. They took one look at him and one said to the other, "Hey, Bruce, isn't that the f-ing idiot who jumped in the car when we were pushing it?"

[rogerb]

Love it - nice one Steph.