Post by trikzter2000 on Feb 26, 2007 17:46:24 GMT
TWO OLD MEN
TWO VERY ELDERLY FRIENDS, MAX AND RALPH MET IN THE PARK EVERY DAY TO FEED THE PIGEONS, WATCH THE SQUIRRELS AND DISCUSS WORLD PROBLEMS. ONE DAY RALPH DIDN'T SHOW UP. MAX DIDN'T THINK MUCH ABOUT IT, FIGURING MAYBE HE HAD A COLD OR SOMETHING.
BUT AFTER RALPH HADN'T SHOWN UP FOR A WEEK OR SO MAX REALLY GOT WORRIED. HOWEVER, THE ONLY TIME THEY EVER GOT TOGETHER ANYMORE WAS AT THE PARK, AND MAX COULD NOT REMEMBER WHERE RALPH LIVED SO HE WAS UNABLE TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED TO HIM.
A MONTH PASSED AND MAX FIGURED OLD RALPH HAD GONE TO HIS HEAVENLY REWARD. BUT ONE DAY MAX WENT TO THE PARK AND, LO AND BEHOLD, THERE SAT RALPH.
MAX WAS VERY EXCITED AND HAPPY TO SEE HIM AND TOLD HIM SO. THEN HE SAID, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD RALPH, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU???"
RALPH REPLIED, "I HAVE BEEN IN JAIL."
JAIL???," CRIED MAX! "WHAT IN THE WORLD FOR???" "WELL," RALPH SAID, "YOU KNOW SUE, THAT CUTE LITTLE BLONDE WAITRESS AT THE COFFEE SHOP WHERE WE GET COFFEE SOMETIMES?"
"YEAH," SAID MAX, "I REMEMBER HER. WHAT ABOUT HER?"
"WELL, ONE DAY LAST MONTH SHE GOT MAD AT ME AND TO GET EVEN, SHE CHARGED ME WITH RAPE. I WAS SO PROUD OF WHAT EVERYONE WOULD THINK AN OLD FART LIKE ME COULD STILL DO, THAT WHEN I GOT INTO COURT, I PLED 'GUILTY'".
THE JUDGE THEN TOOK A GOOD LOOK AT ME AND GAVE ME 30 DAYS FOR PERJURY."
TWO VERY ELDERLY FRIENDS, MAX AND RALPH MET IN THE PARK EVERY DAY TO FEED THE PIGEONS, WATCH THE SQUIRRELS AND DISCUSS WORLD PROBLEMS. ONE DAY RALPH DIDN'T SHOW UP. MAX DIDN'T THINK MUCH ABOUT IT, FIGURING MAYBE HE HAD A COLD OR SOMETHING.
BUT AFTER RALPH HADN'T SHOWN UP FOR A WEEK OR SO MAX REALLY GOT WORRIED. HOWEVER, THE ONLY TIME THEY EVER GOT TOGETHER ANYMORE WAS AT THE PARK, AND MAX COULD NOT REMEMBER WHERE RALPH LIVED SO HE WAS UNABLE TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED TO HIM.
A MONTH PASSED AND MAX FIGURED OLD RALPH HAD GONE TO HIS HEAVENLY REWARD. BUT ONE DAY MAX WENT TO THE PARK AND, LO AND BEHOLD, THERE SAT RALPH.
MAX WAS VERY EXCITED AND HAPPY TO SEE HIM AND TOLD HIM SO. THEN HE SAID, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD RALPH, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU???"
RALPH REPLIED, "I HAVE BEEN IN JAIL."
JAIL???," CRIED MAX! "WHAT IN THE WORLD FOR???" "WELL," RALPH SAID, "YOU KNOW SUE, THAT CUTE LITTLE BLONDE WAITRESS AT THE COFFEE SHOP WHERE WE GET COFFEE SOMETIMES?"
"YEAH," SAID MAX, "I REMEMBER HER. WHAT ABOUT HER?"
"WELL, ONE DAY LAST MONTH SHE GOT MAD AT ME AND TO GET EVEN, SHE CHARGED ME WITH RAPE. I WAS SO PROUD OF WHAT EVERYONE WOULD THINK AN OLD FART LIKE ME COULD STILL DO, THAT WHEN I GOT INTO COURT, I PLED 'GUILTY'".
THE JUDGE THEN TOOK A GOOD LOOK AT ME AND GAVE ME 30 DAYS FOR PERJURY."