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Post by Emerald Midi on Sept 1, 2005 10:56:43 GMT
Music, Gig Jokes and anecdotes to be placed in this thread only.
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Post by Emerald Midi on Sept 1, 2005 11:18:56 GMT
Here's plethora of musician jokes to start us off:
How do you get two piccolo players to play in perfect unison?
Shoot one.
What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin ?
Who cares - neither one's a guitar
How do you know when the stage is level ?
The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth ..
Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune ?
Neither did I
Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners ?
So the rest of the band can understand them
What do you call a guitarist who breaks up with his girlfriend ?
Homeless ..
What's the definition of a minor second?
Two oboists playing in perfect unison.
How do you get a guitar player off of your front porch ?
Pay for the pizza.
How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune ?
Evidently all of them.
What do you do if your bassist is drowning?
Throw him his amp.
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by leo on Sept 1, 2005 11:30:21 GMT
Wonderful idea for the forum.
As a keyboard player I love this one.
How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb ?
None...they just steal somebody else's light
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stivy
Member
Av It!!!
Posts: 45
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Post by stivy on Oct 31, 2005 17:01:52 GMT
I love telling this in clubs!
How do you get 150 cows into one room?
Put a sign above the door saying bingo!!!
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Post by Emerald Midi on Oct 31, 2005 23:20:44 GMT
Ooch, stivy. Hope my wife doesn't see this  |
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a.j.
Member
Posts: 176
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Post by a.j. on Nov 10, 2005 15:42:45 GMT
What's the difference between a guitarist and a pizza?
A pizza can feed a family of four.
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Post by sean on Jun 21, 2006 22:15:22 GMT
THE 3 REMAINING MEMBERS OF QUEEN ARE REFORMING A BAND & CALLING IT RIGHT FREDS DEAD!.....SORRY
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Post by sean on Jun 21, 2006 22:22:49 GMT
Heres a good 1 to try on ur fellow musicians, ask them to name as many instruments as they can beginning wit the letter 'A'.... all hel think of is accordian, then ask him to name as many animals as he can that sh*ts pellets, hel say a list of them eg rabbit, mouse, rat etc... then say to him...YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT SH*T THAN U DO MUSIC!... works every time
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